Black Feast

I was born with bad blood From a mad mother’s genes My moody teens ruined By contempt and disdain I took refuge in boredom Old books and the dead Listened out the slow rain In a red satin bed

Black wines like a liturgy to crushed rubies Black caviar all of the courses unnatural Black waiters, black masseurs, a black Beckstein piano Black carnations And our own blacked out faces Black candles, black candies an end to it all

The brothels, The Ritz, the jeweled cane in the hall The whole self indulgent extravaganza Committed to this staring at a black mirror To find myself blackly invisible To my life as it was in hedonistic Paris And me with the guests gone at a quarter to four Conducting the rites to my own funeral